Hello again!
As promised, we’re back this week with actionable strategies to help set you up for gentler postpartum season.
Although there are universal needs, support looks different for each person. Contemplate: What makes you feel supported? Is it a clean house? Your favorite meal? Physical touch? A bath? A conversation with a friend? When you know the answers, it is much easier to ask for what you need.
Here are some ways in which to help you plan ahead for this often overwhelming time, so you can prioritize healing, getting to know your baby and learning how to feed.
- Pre-enroll/delegate support from family and friends. Many people want to offer their support to you during this time, but aren't sure exactly how. Being specific about your needs will help them help you. Identify: who can I vent to without judgement? Who can I lean on for a good laugh? Are there any relationships that I need to set boundaries around?
- Organize a meal train ahead of time – be sure to list any dietary restrictions, favorite dishes, dislikes & restaurants. Mealtrain.com is a super user-friendly platform and allows your loved ones to sign up for meals online. Their free version allows your people to commit to one meal a day which is usually sufficient, and people can see what others are sending so you're not stuck eating chili five nights in a row. Further, people who are far away can also participate, as they can send over Uber Eats or take-out, instead of physically dropping food off. For those who do drop food off, placing a cooler on your front porch can alleviate feeling pressured into visiting with guests while you heal. Also request that they put their names on the containers so they can be returned efficiently.
- You can also prepare “double batches” of dishes during your pregnancy and freeze them for later (bonus points if you pre-cut them into individual servings and attach re-heating instructions to the dish).
- Write out a grocery list/amazon list with specific products and brands that you usually buy (e.g. instead of just putting down almond butter, specify “WF 365 Brand Organic, Creamy, Unsalted Almond Butter”)
- Prepare some easy snacks you can keep at your bedside, like trail mix, dried fruits, or veggie chips. Some people even place a cooler in their room to keep perishable items within (one) arm's reach.
- Pre-cutting fruits and veggies beforehand will also be super helpful. Big containers of yogurt, kitchari or bone brother - basically things that require little or no prep, are easily digested and can be stored for later will be your best friends.
- Breastfeeding makes you extremely thirsty, so have lots of coconut, sparkling or chia water on hand. Infusing your water with strawberries, basil or cucumber are also low maintenance ways to change things up a bit, while still getting your daily 3.1 liters (13 cups!) in (versus 2.2 liters or 9 cups that is recommended for non-pregnant/lactating people). Simply grab them from your pre-cut reserves and pop them into your water to keep your palette intrigued.
- Write out some chore cards beforehand. These will give visitors some guidance in terms of how they can help and will ensure that your floors aren't been vacuumed twice in two days, while your bathrooms go to sh!t (terrible pun intended). Weekly reminders like “garbage is picked up on Thursday,” or “the dog groomers come every other Monday” may sound trivial, but can be life-savers during the hazy blur that often accompanies the postpartum experience.
- Preparing postpartum affirmations like the ones you might have used in birth can also be helpful, as our thoughts have a tangible influence on the way our emotions manifest. “This too shall pass,” “I am exactly what my baby needs,” and “One day at a time” are some examples.
- Get to know your own love language & that of your partner. This will help you show up for one another in the tumultuousness that is postpartum.
- Research postpartum support groups to turn to after baby arrives. This time can be incredibly isolating and it’s important to have community to lean on, especially among others who are also experiencing the dramatic shifts of new parenthood.
Remember, the average first time labor takes 12-24 hours and we’re crafting birth plans for that. Breastfeeding in the first year takes up about 1800 hours alone, so do yourself a favor and pre-cover your bases by also drafting postpartum plan. Thank us later!
Love,
Mothership